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Student writing assessment exemplar:
Space exploration is the traveling in space to explore using special machines such as rockets and spaceships etc. Space exploration is a waste of money and going to space is very dangerous period. It is not good to explore in space because of the cost. It takes millions of dollars to launch a rocket into space and the money used for this could be spent on things that are more worth while like investing in technology to increase the health of the environment. We can use the money to take care of people and to solve the problems of earth. In addition, other dangers involved in launching a rocket into space are just too terrible. Like for example when a space rocket is about to launch in space if there’s not enough fuel, or some damage, the rocket could just explode with human beings on it. Entering space is dangerous because there is not enough oxygen and gravity. Humans need special equipment to breathe and walk out of the rocket in space and this equipment is expensive. Another reason why I think it’s not good for people to continue to travel to space is because it would cause pollution to the earth. Like for example when they are about to leave the earth the flames or smoke from the space shuttle can cause air pollution thereby endangering the lives of plants and animals. On the other hand there are benefits in space traveling. Doing experiments from expeditions carried out by the astronauts give very good information. Other benefits are like learning about the moon and the different planets and what they’re made of, how hot or cold they are, and most importantly get to learn about how to keep the earth healthy from all the different gases. But maybe these experiments we can do on earth and we can save money to use on caring for earth and humans. Maybe we need to learn more about how is the earth going to be more healthy from pollution and that’s all I can say about the topic of space exploration.
Level 5: Uses a range of subject-specific words (space exploration, machines, rockets, oxygen, gravity, pollution, gases), academic words (explore, investing, solve, problems, involved, explode, benefits, learning, topic), technical words (launch, technology, equipment, experiments, expeditions), words with multiple meanings (space, environment, fuel, shuttle), idioms (on the other hand), and figurative language (-)
Level 5: Uses a variety of compound sentences (But maybe these experiments we can do on earth and we can save money to use on caring for earth and humans.) and complex sentences (Entering space is dangerous because there is not enough oxygen and gravity.) Attempts compound-complex sentences (It takes millions of dollars to launch a rocket into space and the money used for this could be spent on things that are more worth while like investing in technology to increase the health of the environment.)
Level 5: Uses a range of connector and transition words and phrases to summarize (most importantly, that’s all I can say), introduce examples (such as, like, for example), conclude (period, thereby), clarify (in addition, because, another reason), and qualify (but, maybe)
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